I was always skeptical about anything that I considered “esoteric,” so no one was more surprised than I was to find myself doing energy work.
In 2000, my dog was dying of advanced stage liver disease, and a Reiki master visiting from Japan offered to send her a healing for free. The dog had a miraculous recovery (the vet’s words, not mine) and ended up living for another five years. I asked the Reiki master what she did, and could she teach me how to do it. She explained the basics of energy healing and offered to attune me for free.
My acceptance of her gift was akin to taking the red pill and jumping down Alice’s rabbit hole. It pushed me onto a path of self-discovery that has never stopped. I voraciously studied everything about healing and energy that I could get my hands on, and I’m still learning.
Over the years I’ve been attuned to a number of different Reiki modalities, became certified in hypnotherapy, polarity therapy, quantum healing, golden frequency, life coaching, and many other types of energy work, including Reconnective Healing.
My intuitive abilities that I’ve had since I was a child also blossomed. I studied and took courses with intuitives like Caroline Myss and Sonia Choquette. I worked on my mediumship and channeling abilities, and eventually realized that I had an aptitude for finding missing people. I volunteer my time to a group called Find Me, which consists of retired law enforcement officers, search and rescue teams, forensic analysts, and over 100 vetted psychics, all working together, free of charge, to bring the missing home.
At the end of 2013, an event happened that completely changed my perception of healing. I was rushed to the emergency room because I was going into cardiac arrest and I was also having what appeared to be seizures. I found out that I have Graves’ Disease, which is an autoimmune disease that causes hyperthyroidism. I was having a thyroid storm, which is a very rare event that was a result of the disease going untreated, and can be fatal. The ER doctors told me that the paramedics got to me just in time.
I was told that the disease is chronic, and it never goes away. It can go into remission and be treated with medication, radiation, or surgery, but that’s it.
As a healer, I’ve heard this song and dance a thousand times from clients. I’d seen so many miracles, and so many occasions where doctors were proven wrong, that I thought “This is no big deal. I’m a healer and I know what to do. This will be a piece of cake.”
Pretty arrogant, right? I had this idea in my head that if you were sick, you were broken and needed to be fixed. I figured that I could do some energy work, find whatever mindset was causing the problem, and the issue would resolve easily and quickly.
I have never been more wrong in my life.
I did everything that I knew how to do, but nothing worked. I got sicker and sicker, to the point of where I even had difficulty walking. My muscles would seize up, which caused excruciating pain and bouts of vertigo.
Friends and family cared for me when I needed it, and I began to get really down on myself for not being able to “fix” the problem. I was in and out of the hospital, and constantly at either the doctors’ office, or one of the many CAM providers that were trying to help me.
One morning I woke up and I knew it was going to be an especially bad day of suffering. I called my twin sister, yet again, and asked her to come and help me take care of my dogs and get me set up for a day in bed.
While I waited for her, I started to cry. I was done. I couldn’t take it anymore. I was a pathetic sick healer who sucked so bad that she couldn’t even heal herself. I threw myself quite the pity party.
Finally, I said “Okay God. I don’t know why this is happening. I don’t know why I am being punished this way, but I’m done. I give up because I don’t have the energy to fight anymore, but I can’t continue to suffer like this. Help me, or let me go home.”
Surrendering changed something. It was just a little shift at first, but things started to get better. I stopped hating this new body of mine that caused so much suffering, and started learning from it. I also learned to love it again, pain and all.
Eventually, I began to heal. I didn’t have to do anything but to love and accept myself, and realize that I was never actually broken. I just forgot what health felt like for a little while.
I finally recognized that the illness was as big of a blessing as getting my first Reiki attunement. I learned more about healing and the human spirit within a couple of years of illness, than I had in the previous 13 years.
It’s made me a better conduit for healing. Stepping out of the way and allowing the energy and information to flow has become an effortless process, which allows my clients to get the most out of their experience. They’ve benefited from my illness almost as much as I have.
I am here to help raise the vibration of humanity, whatever that takes. I am committed to helping people to reconnect to Source, embracing their personal power and life path, and to finding grace and healing where they least expect it.
Thank you for allowing me to be a part of your journey.